Black Out
by Princess1895
Summary: Is set during Eclipse right after the Cullens fight the newborn vampires. Werewolves not included. Someone gets hurt... Carlisle/Esme Bella/Edward. From different Cullens' POVs. My first fanfic. Any suggestions would be very helpful. R
1. Chapter 1

_Disclaimer: The original characters and plot are the property of the author, Stephanie Meyer. _

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**Bella's POV**

"Is everyone here?" Carlisle asked, looking around, silently counting to make sure. "…five, six, seven…. We are missing someone, Esme!"

We all looked around, searching the barren ground for her….

"There's someone over there," Rosalie said, pointing to a body lying immobile on the ground a distance away.

Edward picked me up and ran with the rest of the Cullens over to where the body lay on the ground. The body was covered in red crescent-shaped marks and saturated in mud. It was Esme, dear, caring Esme! She was squirming and rolling on her back with such a look of pain and agony on her heart-shaped face. One hand was pulling at her hair whilst the other was trying to reach her back.

"Esme?" Carlisle said brokenly. "Esme?" he pleaded but she didn't answer. She didn't even open her eyes. Carlisle looked at his family around him and said, "Let's get her home."

I hadn't realized that Edward had put me down until he leaned towards me to pick me up in his arms once again. I turned my head to look at him and then back to Esme and I found I could not take my eyes from her face; she was in so much pain, poor Esme. Carlisle had lifted her up so gently and carried her back to his car. Edward and I followed behind.

Edward quickly settled me into the back seat of the car whilst Carlisle gently laid Esme in the middle. Edward climbed in beside her and gently laid her head in his lap. No sooner had Carlisle slid into the driver's seat but we were travelling at break-neck speed through the winding roads.

I looked out of the tinted windows of the Mercedes. They made everything outside look really gloomy, even gloomier than usual although it was the middle of a bright sunny day. That was saying something for the weather in this part of the country, even on sunny days the clouds remained floating endlessly across the sky.

The humming of the engine and Esme's continuous groans of pain were the only other sounds.

Suddenly, I felt something sharp digging into my leg and I let out a yelp of pain.

"What is it, Bella?" Edward asked, looking over at me.

I looked down and saw Esme's hand tight around my leg, even though she was in pain her grip was strong, almost like a vice and not wanting to let go. I tried to take her hand away but it was impossible.

"Edward…her hand," I breathed with a pleading not in my voice.

"What?" Carlisle looked back.

"Her hand. She's…holding onto my leg, it hurts."

Edward tried to unclench her hands. "Esme, let go," but her hands were unmovable. "She's not letting go," Edward said to Carlisle.

"Bella," Carlisle said, "hold out your leg so I can reach it." He leaned back in the seat and reached out with one hand, keeping his eyes on the road, and softly touched Esme's hand. "Esme, Esme, please, you're hurting Bella, sweetheart. Please, let go." Slowly the pain in my leg subsided and her hand loosened its grip. I must have been holding my breath because I felt myself exhale slowly. "I'm sorry, Bella," Carlisle apologized. "She didn't mean to."

"I know, it's all right, I'm fine," I replied. "Really, I am," I said when Edward gave me a questioning look, as though he did not believe me. Always so protective.

We arrived at the house in no time at all: I had never known Carlisle to drive so fast! He was usually the safest of all the drivers in the Cullen family, but then it was not every day when his Esme is hurt and in pain. The rest of the Cullens were right behind us.

Edward lifted Esme's head from his lap and gently laid it down on the seat. He then got out of the car and ran around to the other side to open my door and let me out. Carlisle then cautiously lifted Esme from the back seat. I turned and walked toward the house along with Edward. Suddenly, there was a scream from behind me and I stopped short.

"Carlisle…move…your…hand!" Esme said between clenched teeth, fighting with Carlisle's arm underneath her back.

"Sorry, sweetheart." Carlisle swiftly moved his arm from underneath her back.

I anxiously turned my head towards Edward. He looked down at me and must have seen my horrified expression because he reached out to comfort me. "She's going to be all right, Bella, trust me…." He trailed off, hugging my shoulders.

I thought to myself… _Would she be all right? It was all my fault. They had fought those other vampires – I shivered – to protect me and now Esme's hurt. What if Carlisle couldn't do anything? What if_

_Esme di… No! I told myself. No, she couldn't, she just couldn't. Carlisle can fix anything! He'll fix this, he will._

We walked through the front door, Carlisle following close behind. As he walked through the house he called out, "Rosalie, Alice, please come with me," he said.

"Can I come, too?" I asked suddenly.

"Of course, Bella, I just didn't think you'd want to."

All three of us followed Carlisle upstairs while he carried Esme in his arms.

I didn't really realize where we were going until we got there, my mind was on Esme. _If anything happened to the sweet woman who I loved like a mother, it would be all my fault._

"Bella, Bella…." Alice broke into my reverie.

I was in a wide, large, beige coloured room with old looking paintings. Everything just felt…warm, comfortable. It must be Esme and Carlisle's bedroom.

Suddenly there was another scream. I looked around and saw that Carlisle had laid Esme down on the bed on her stomach. He had lifted up her shirt. I saw red marks all over her back and I started to feel a little queasy. _Oh, no_, I thought, _blood!_

"Rosalie, my bag, please," said Carlisle. Rosalie turned to fetch his medical bag and handed it to him.

I turned my attention back to the present situation. Esme's face was in the pillow and she was holding onto it so tightly that her nails were ripping through it. I walked over to the bed, next to Alice and whispered, "Is she going to be okay?"

"Yes, I think so," Carlisle answered, but the look on his face was unsure. "Esme, honey, you're your head up for me." Esme lifted her head up slightly and Carlisle put his hand under her chin. "Here, take this." He was giving her some kind of pill. "No, Esme, swallow it." Thirty seconds passed and Esme went limp.

"Okay, let's do this fast. I'm not sure how long it'll last, with the venom."

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**My first fanfic. Please tell me what you think of it. Any suggestions on how to write "better" would be awesome. I will have the next chapter up as soon as possible. Maybe even this weekend. **


	2. Chapter 2

**This chapter is quite a bit shorter but I hope it answers some of your questions. **

_Disclaimer: The original characters and plot are the property of the author, Stephanie Meyer. _

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**Esme's POV**

It was dark, that's all there was—darkness. The numbing feeling of being alone in the dark, but I wasn't alone. I could remember what happened. All the people, all the confusion. The brief but vivid pictures flashed by…

_Carlisle was helping me fight Chelsea. There was a call from Rosalie from across the clearing. _

"_Go, Carlisle," I told him. _

"_But, Esme," he protested. _

"_No, she needs you more. Now GO!" I told him again. He ran off and I was left alone with Chelsea. I lunged at her, but I missed, dammit! _

"_Oh, your poor family." She started taunting me. "I wonder what will happen when your dear family is torn apart. I wonder what Isabella will do without her dear Edward." I froze. What was she saying? Would we lose? And lose everyone as well?_

_Before I knew it she had me pinned to the ground. I was trying to fight her off but I had never really been a fighter. She was biting me all over—my face, my arms, my back, my legs. It stung, like a billion needles. Then she was gone. I was left on the ground, withering in pain._

… The rest was just black, with short, sudden scenes that I could remember. Being in the car, getting out…

The pain started again and there was no more black. I opened my eyes, or so I thought. White, that's what I saw; white. Was I in heaven? Was Carlisle right? Even if we were damned to being vampires for the rest of eternity without a soul, did we still go to heaven when we died? But the pain was still there. There wasn't supposed to be any pain in heaven, was there? I rolled my head to the side. Oh, that's why. My face had been in a pillow. That's why I could only see white. Wait! Pillow? What—

"Esme? Esme, darling, I need you to let go," said a voice, it was Carlisle's voice! I mustn't be in heaven then. But he said let go—let go of what?

Then his face came into focus.

Oh, I slowly loosened my grip and he took my hand and started rubbing something on it. It smelled awful, then I remembered the pain. It had been coming from my hands, but it was gone now.

After he was done, he let go of my hand, gently kissed me forehead, and walked toward the door. I cried out in protest. My angel couldn't leave me! He turned around and walked back over and sat on the edge of the bed. He took up my hand again and started making small circles on the back with his thumb. I relaxed and closed my eyes, content.

"Esme darling, I'm sorry I did this to you. This never should have happened."

I opened my eyes, alarmed. What was he talking about? He never did anything to me. He never would. He was not making any sense. I looked at his face; his expression was full of sorrow and guilt. I wanted to get closer to him and tell him everything was all right, that he never did anything to me. I tried to roll over on my back but the pain came again, shooting up my spine. I cried out again, in pain.

Carlisle's gentle hands were instantly comforting me, rubbing my shoulders ever so carefully. "Please don't try to move, sweetheart. You will just hurt more."

Oh, but I had to hold and comfort Carlisle. He didn't understand and unless I got over the pain and moved so I could tell him it wasn't his fault, he would hold this guilt for the rest of eternity.

I slowly tried to move again, knowing what to expect, and bit my lip, hard, to prevent me from crying out again when the pain came. Carlisle noticed that I was trying to move again and tried to get me to lie down.

"Oh, please don't do this, Esme," he said sorrowfully, letting go of my hand and gently pushing me back down upon the bed.

Oh! He didn't understand. How could I tell him? _Oh, really Esme, you really are silly! Just use your mouth!_

I tried to open my mouth but nothing came out. Why couldn't I speak? It felt like I hadn't spoken a word in years.


	3. Chapter 3

**Wow! Three chapters in one day! This one is even shorter than the last, but...whatever.**

_Disclaimer: The original characters and plot are the property of the author, Stephanie Meyer._

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**Edward's POV**

_Finally_, he's changed his mind. I don't think I could take anymore of his grief and sorrow, and the fact that he couldn't believe that it wasn't his fault that Esme was hurt. His thoughts, usually so peaceful, were terrible, he was so worried and scared. He was blaming himself so much, having the same horrid thoughts of guilt and sorrow over and over again. _I can't believe I did this to Esme, it is all my fault. She'll never forgive me, never, for doing this to her._ Jasper was getting pretty annoyed himself, and he couldn't hear Carlisle's thoughts. Esme had finally forced herself to talk and Carlisle promised to listen to her.

Just now my problem was Bella. She stayed over at the house after we got back about an hour and a half ago, and had been hanging out with Alice and Rosalie. I have been watching her and there is absolutely no enthusiasm showing in her face, only sorrow. I mean, considering what happened I thought that she might have a little bit of life in her. Of course, you don't have to be a mind reader to know that she blames herself for the situation. You can just tell by her face, she won't talk, not to anybody. Even Alice can't get anything from her. I can only hope that this changes soon. Maybe she'll feel better tomorrow.

"Bella." I walked over to the couch where she and Alice were watching a movie. "I should probably take you home now."

"Okay." She got up from the couch and walked toward to door.

_Edward._ Alice's thoughts drifted over to me. _Edward, I don't understand it. She's not saying anything and I can't get it out of her. Try to get her to say something about it tonight._ I nodded my head and followed Bella out the door to my Volvo. She got in the passenger side and stared straight ahead, saying nothing at all.

I dropped her off at Charlie's and quickly drove back to the house. Everything was still the same when I got there. I had left without telling anyone where I was going, but Alice probably already knew. She would tell them. I grabbed a new shirt in case I was at Bella's the entire night.

When I arrived back at Bella's she was ready for bed and waiting for me. I took this as my chance to ask her what was wrong. I sat beside her, on the bed, and looked into her eyes.

"Bella," I started. "Can you _please_ tell me what is wrong?" She looked at me with her big chocolate brown eyes and didn't say a thing. "Bella, please tell me, you know that you can always tell me anything." She looked at me for a few seconds, picked up her pillow, and simply broke down. She sobbed into the pillow as though her heart was breaking so I leaned forward to pull her into my arms and hugged her.

"Oh, Edward. I—I'm so s..s…sorry…" she said between sobs. "I didn't m..m…mean for th…is to h..h…happen, it's all m..m…y f..f…ault." The tears were streaming down her face by now.

I lifted her head up so I could look at her properly. "Bella, it is not your fault, how could it be, you could not prevent Esme or anyone from getting hurt. It was no one's fault at all, stop blaming yourself."

"Yes I know, but Edward, none of this would be happening if it were not for me, so it _is_ all my fault. Esme would not be lying in pain now if I had not come into your lives, she must really hate me."

She continued sobbing into the pillow and I gathered her into my arms and laid her down on the bed beside her. I tried to comfort her as best I could but she was determined to take the blame for tonight. She was tired and needed sleep, and she probably wouldn't believe me if I told her that all Esme was thinking as that Bella was all right! Maybe the answer to this was for Esme to talk to her tomorrow herself and reassure her. Bella still did not understand vampires; she did not understand how quickly they healed. Maybe tomorrow she would understand.

I stroked her cheek, brushing a tendril of hair behind her ear and hummed her lullaby, hoping that it would soothe her into sleep. It was not too long before her breathing slowed and I held her in my arms until morning.


	4. Chapter 4

**Here's the fourth chapter. If I'm lucky I might be able to put the fifth one up.  
Warning: cliff hanger **

_Disclaimer: The original characters and plot are the property of the author, Stephanie Meyer._

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**Bella's POV**

I woke up the next morning and my first thought was "_Where is Edward?"_ I sat up in my bed looking around the room. My heart fell in disappointment, then a thought emerged, _Oh my god, what happened yesterday, was that real or not, I hope not._ Just then Edward climbed through my window and walked towards me.

"Good morning," he said. He did not sound like his usual self, he was not happy at all and his tone held a certain amount of sadness in it. I did not understand this. "How are you feeling, love?" he asked.

I replied, "Er, I em, I don't know really. Is it a good morning?" I questioned.

He looked at me quizzically then said, "I'm going to take you to my house today, okay?" What! Go to his house? I can't do that. I couldn't look at Esme and pretend it wasn't my fault.

"Edward, I—I can't go. I…I…c..can't look at her."I dropped my head to my knees and closed my eyes as all the emotions from last night came flooding back.

"Which is why I'm taking you, Bella, you have to come, you need to see Esme, speak to her. Now, if you get dressed we can leave quickly."

Reluctantly, I got off the bed and went to the bathroom to have a shower. Charlie had already left for work so Edward went downstairs while I dressed. Once I was ready I came down and we left together to head for Edward's house.

As I reached the Volvo, Edward was waiting with the passenger door open. We got to the house within less than five minutes. Edward must be really desperate for me to spend some time with Esme. I got out of the car and headed toward the door. Again, Edward was already standing by with the door open and showed me inside.

"Where is everyone?" I asked. There was no one to be seen and the house was deadly quiet.

"Carlisle had to go to the hospital for a couple of hours, Emmett and Rosalie are out hunting, and Alice and Jasper are upstairs with Esme."

"Oh," was all I could say.

Edward started to lead me up the stairs, right to Esme and Carlisle's room. He opened the door and I walked in. Alice and Jasper were sitting on the love seat by the window. Esme was lying in the bed, dressed in a night gown, her back towards me. She rolled over to look at me when I entered the room.

Edward nodded toward Alice and Jasper and they got up and left. Then Edward kissed the top of my head and was gone before I realized it.

"Bella," Esme called softly, "come here." I walked over to the bed. "Sit down, dear." I sat down on the edge of the bed, but kept my head down.

Esme sat up and rested against the mound of pillows at her back. "Bella dear, what is wrong, tell me please?"

I didn't say anything. _What would I say? Esme, I'm sorry that it is my fault that you almost got killed? No, of course not!_ "I—I feel terrible," I said instead.

"Why? Why on earth do you feel terrible, dear?" She looked at me, studying my face with varying expressions.

"It—" Oh, I couldn't bring myself to say it. "It was my fault you were almost killed, Esme," I said quickly, still not looking up. There, it was out. I had said it, now she would be angry with me for causing all of this.

Esme sighed. "Bella, why do you think that it is your fault?"

The words rushed out of my mouth as though I could not say them quick enough. "Because if it wasn't for me you wouldn't have had to fight those other vampires, if it wasn't for me there wouldn't have been a crazy vampire, thirsty for revenge after you all. If it wasn't for me then you would not have gotten hurt, you would not be lying here in pain and your family would be happy. It's all my faul….."

Esme stopped me before I could go on. "Really, Bella, you are just like Carlisle. He blames himself for it because he was not with me and could not protect me; you blame yourself because we were trying to protect you from sadistic vampires. Really, Bella, you need to understand us, we are stronger and more robust than you realize, and you are only human remember, so we need to protect you." I just looked at her aghast. _She does not blame me after all, and how can Carlisle blame himself for this? Now, that is kind of silly!_ "Carlisle was not with me because he was helping Rosalie. He didn't know that this would happen so it wasn't his fault. If it was anyone's fault it was my own for not being more vigilant!"

"So now you're thinking that it was your fault because Victoria was after you, yes?" she continued, and I nodded. "Now, didn't we tell you we wanted to help, Bella? We care about you, we care about Edward. If he lost you, his life would be miserable forever, he would have nothing left to live for. You saw the way he reacted earlier this year when he thought that you had jumped off that cliff and died. That's why we fought, for the two of you. It was our decision and our decision alone. That's what families do for one another, they fight when they need to so it had nothing to do with you and it's not your fault."

I looked up to her face and it all started to sink in. She didn't hate me, I wasn't to blame. I looked into her gentle, darkening ochre eyes. They were pleading with me to believe her, and I did, but it looked like she was crying.

_Wait! That's not possible. Vampires can't cry!_

"Um, ah, Esme, what's wrong?" She just looked at me, confused. "Your eyes they're—they look like—"

"What is it, Bella?"

"You're crying."

Alice and Jasper ran into the room. Alice rushed over to the bed. "Esme, what's going on?"

"I don't know." She put her hand up to her face and felt a wetness there. "It's not tears, it doesn't smell salty." She licked her finger. "It doesn't taste salty, either."

Alice took out her cell phone. "I'll call Carlisle. We need to know what's happening."

"Can't you see her future, Alice?" Jasper asked, coming to stand behind her, resting his hand on her small shoulders.

"No, it's blurry for some reason."

"Maybe the tears have something to do with it."

"Yes, maybe. Oh, hi, Carlisle," Alice said into her phone. "You need to come home quickly. Esme seems to be crying tears, but not really tears if you know what I mean." "What, yes, we don't really know." "Yes, all right, okay, bye for now." We could only hear Alice's side of the conversation and once Alice ended the call she looked at us and said, "He will be here in five minutes."

Edward had just entered the room and I looked at him when he spoke. "What is going on?"

Edward was speaking to Alice in the hope that she had got a vision about this but she only replied, "I don't know" and shook her head slowly, uncertainly. "I just don't know."


	5. Chapter 5

**Here's the fifth chapter. I probably won't be able to put the next one up until next weekend, but we'll see.  
**

_Disclaimer: The original characters and plot are the property of the author, Stephanie Meyer._

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**Esme's POV**

I was crying! How is that possible? It wasn't even tears. It didn't taste salty like tears should, it tasted sweet. Carlisle has returned home by now so I told him so, but he didn't understand what it was either.

As I was talking to him I started to feel…tried. Vampires can't get tired either! I wasn't emotionally tired, like we can become, but physically tired. Then Carlisle was really confused. He just told me to lie down for a bit. The last thing I remembered, as I put my head on the pillow and closed my eyes, was Carlisle walking through the door to his study, before I dreamed of kittens and angels for the first time in 85 years. I was asleep!

_There were clouds with angels sitting on top of them. They were smiling, their pearly white wings glistening in the brightly shining sun. It was all peaceful, everything calm, dreamy…some of them were singing with their beautiful lilting voices…._

"_Carlisle!" Alice's voice came from one of the beautiful angels. "Edward!" Alice's voice called. Why was Alice in my dream? Why would Carlisle and Edward be there? Angels?_

"Jasper!" I opened my eyes slightly, finally startled out of my little fantasy.

"She was sleeping! I walked in and she was fast asleep!"

"Alice, are you sure?"

"Absolutely, Carlisle. She was even talking in her sleep, like Bella does."

"Edward, what do you think?"

"Well, when I was downstairs with Bella she was thinking about…angels. I thought that she was just daydreaming."

"And you are absolutely can't see her future, Alice?"

"No. I think it's because I was human so I can see the humans' future. I am a vampire so I can see a vampire's future. But because Esme is sleeping and can cry, which vampires shouldn't be able to do, I can't see her future."

Everything was silent and my back was turned so I couldn't see them, and I really didn't feel like I had enough energy to move at the moment. The back of my throat was burning like hot coals from not being able to hunt lately.

"Carlisle," I whispered. "Come here please."

"What is it?" he asked, walking over to my side of the bed.

"I need to go hunting," I told him. "My throat is burning terribly."

"All right. Um, I guess we can go once you get dressed."

I was ready to go. Carlisle and I stood by the open window in his study. After our one clear day in Forks, the blue sky was already being covered over by a thick layer of clouds. It was probably going to rain or even snow again tonight.

"Ready?" Carlisle squeezed my hand softly.

"Ready." I smiled. With that we jumped into the air, gracefully landing on the stony ground beneath. We set off a run into the woods.

We stopped after a few miles when we caught the scent of the deer. There was a buck and two does. _Perfect._

Carlisle inclined his head toward them, indicating to me to advance so I chase after the buck as they began to run when they caught our predatory scents. They were no match for our superior speed and strength. The animalistic side of me that was always hidden by the human façade came to life, and I pounced upon the buck and started sucking greedily at its neck. The warm, luscious taste of the blood quenched the burning in my throat to bearable, but it did not satisfy me fully.

I finished and carried the carcass over to where Carlisle was finishing the last of the two does. He uprooted a tree and buried all three.

"Are you done?" He wrapped his arm around my shoulders and kissed my temple.

"Yes, but I don't feel like I'm full." I turned around to look at him. "It's weird. I'm full—I don't want any more blood. I want something else, but I don't know what that something is."

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**If you have any questions about the plot or what's happening in the story, feel free to ask and I'll try to get back to you as soon as possible.**


	6. Chapter 6

**Yeah! Six chapters in one weekend! My longest chapter yet.  
**

_Disclaimer: The original characters and plot are the property of the author, Stephanie Meyer._

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**Carlisle's POV**

Esme had given me a lot to think about. First, she could cry. She said it wasn't salty, it was sweet. So what in our immortal bodies was still sweet? The only probable answer I could come up with was venom. It made sense, to an extent.

Then there was the fact that she could sleep, which, try as I might, I could not come up with a reasonable answer for.

Lastly, there was the blood that would not satisfy her body. Bella had been staying over for meals lately. Once Esme was downstairs when Bella was making herself lunch, she said something smelled good and it gave me an idea. If blood wasn't satisfying her, I wondered if human food would.

I asked Bella if she could make something small for Esme. She gave me a confused look. I just told her that I wanted to experiment. Bella gave Esme some of her "famous" lasagna. I asked Esme to sit down at the table with Bella; she had raised her delicate eyebrows in confusion when she saw the food in front of her. Like I told Bella, I said that I was experimenting. I asked her to try some and…she loved it! She said it tasted rather different, but good. She could still drink blood if she wanted to, but now that she could eat human food, she preferred not to. _This was becoming very strange!_

So all in all, she seemed to changing from vampire to human. I didn't think that she would be fully human and would retain some vampire traits but human all the same. She still had her heightened senses and her speed and strength but she also had certain human characteristics as well.

Every day was mostly the same. I would go to the hospital in the morning, then return to the house to check on Esme on my "lunch break." She spent all of her time alone at home and refused to let any of the kids stay at home with her to help her as she did not want them to miss school to look after her. "We don't need to raise any suspicions just because of me," she told all of us.

She would now eat three meals a day so I would help her make lunch for herself, even though it smells horrible, before returning to the hospital for the remainder of my shift. When I got home I would usually find Alice and/or Rosalie upstairs with Esme, watching over her or simply keeping her company. Emmett and Jasper would be doing anything they liked, and a lot of the time Bella would be there as well, with Edward. After a few nights Charlie started to become concerned that Bella was spending so much time at our home, so I spoke with him to reassure him that Bella was not intruding and was very welcome in our home at any time and that he shouldn't worry about it. He seemed quite happy with this.

Everything was as normal as it could possibly be, but as the days progressed through the week I began to notice a difference in Rosalie's behaviour. She had always masked her true feelings underneath her "cold mask" as Esme called it, but her "mask" hardened. She didn't really talk much, or when she did it was only to Emmett, and she stopped going upstairs with Alice after school to talk with Esme. I didn't know what to think about her strange behaviour. Esme and Rosalie had always been quite close. The similarities of their pasts and certain desires brought them closer. Rosalie was Esme's first beloved daughter and Esme didn't exactly fill the hole in Rosalie of not having her dear mother with her, but she did help quite considerably. So it surprised me when Rosalie tried to avoid Esme when she could.

A few days later I asked Emmett to talk to Rosalie and find out if he could determine what was wrong. He said that he did not know and that she would not speak to him about it. It was then that I decided to approach her myself. I caught her after work one day, sitting outside on the porch reading, while Emmett and Jasper were wrestling on the lawn.

"Rosalie." I came to sit down beside her on the porch steps. "You haven't been acting like yourself lately. I really hope you do not mind that I ask you this, but is there anything wrong at all? It's just that you do not seem to be as close to Esme as you used to be." I said, choosing my words carefully, not wanting to intrude on anything that might be too personal.

She sighed and closed her book. She looked at Emmett and Jasper for a minute, probably wondering if she should tell me or not. She took a deep, unnecessary breath and said quietly, "Carlisle, have you ever been…jealous of someone you loved, over a silly thing that can't really be changed?" Her question surprised me. Rosalie got jealous, of course, her latest person being Bella, we all knew about Rosalie's feelings but no one ever spoke about it, not wanting to upset or embarrass her. Now, for her to speak openly about such feelings, well this was unusual for her.

"Well, I—to tell you the truth, Rose, I don't know."

"It's a strange feeling to say the least," she continued, looking down at the closed book she held in her hands. "You don't want to…hate…this person you love, yet…you do."

"If you don't mind my asking, Rose," I said, getting slightly curious, "who are you jealous of?"

She bent her head even lower and whispered something inaudible, even to my ears.

"I'm sorry, Rose, I didn't hear you."

"Esme!" She almost yelled, throwing the book, which I now recognized to be her private journal that she kept, down on the stairs in front of her, causing Jasper and Emmett to freeze and look at her.

"Oh, Rosalie." I wasn't as good as Esme when it came to consoling someone while physical actions, so I settled on gently patting her on the shoulder.

"Ugh," Rosalie continued, raising her voice with each word. "She can cry like a human, she can sleep like a human, she can even _eat_ like a human and actually _like_ it. It just isn't fair." I knew, of course, how Rosalie resents me for changing her. She wishes to be more human, at any cost really, and her greatest wish was that she could have a child of her own but sadly this would never happen, could never happen!

After I had my little discussion with Rosalie things didn't really go back to normal, but she was more agreeable toward Esme. She would at least talk to her.

Everything else was okay at the house, although there was still no change in Esme, which I guess was a good thing; at least she wasn't getting worse. She was still eating three meals a day but she wasn't hunting as much, which was a slight concern for me. Bella was usually at the house when I returned from the hospital.

It was not only a moth 'till Christmas and life was okay. As I was saying goodbye to Esme and my family one Saturday morning, picking up my medical bag and heading out the door into the crisp morning air, I could not help thinking to myself that something was about to change….

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**The first part of this chapter isn't my favourite and neither is the very end, but I liked writing the part where Rosalie kind of "flips out". Hope you liked it.**


	7. Chapter 7

_Disclaimer: The original characters and plot are the property of the author, Stephanie Meyer. _

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**Bella's POV**

It was finally the weekend. I felt tired; it had been a long week. I'd had a Calculus exam on Thursday, and even though I'm not really one to complain about school, I was glad that I didn't have to go back until Monday. I could spend the whole weekend with the Cullens. Even though I spend most of my time there now, when I'm not working at Newton's or doing whatever else. There was never anything else anyway other than school, Newton's and going to the Cullens—well apart from popping home now and then to see that Charlie was okay! I had to do my duty! I must say that I'm getting a bit obsessive over it, but I guess I can use it as an excuse to be with my soon-to-be-family more, who I'll have to spend the rest of eternity with, anyway. Now it seemed like routine and Charlie didn't even stop me when I ran out the door to my truck.

I had decided that I like going to the Cullen's. I spent my time with Edward, but it also gave me the chance to get to know the other Cullens even better. I even spent quite a bit of my time talking with Alice, Esme and, yes, even Rosalie. A chance to catch up on my "girl time", Edward said. He still wanted me to have all my human experiences, albeit they were vampires.

I was approaching the trees leading to Edward's house, now I just hoped that I could find the gap in the trees that led to their long driveway. I usually come with Edward after school, but he was always the one at the wheel. Today I was on my own so I kept driving, hoping I would recognize the break in the trees when I saw it.

Alice must have seen me coming and known that I wouldn't be able to find the parting because there she was, standing beside a tree, waiting for me. The afternoon sun peaked through tiny gaps in the trees, making her marble skin shimmer. I stopped next to her and she jumped in the passenger seat.

"How's everyone doing today?" I asked her.

"Oh about the same as when you left yesterday," she replied, her tone a little bitter I noticed, but didn't press her on the matter.

I wove through the trees and the large white house that I've come to love came into view. Out of the corner of my eyes I saw Alice grimace.

"Alice, is there anything wrong?" I finally asked. "You don't seem to be acting like yourself."

She sighed. "Well, I came out here to meet you because Esme is giving me a giant headache, if that's even possible." She laughed once without humour. "Carlisle left early this morning and ever since she hasn't been cooperating. It's funny actually. She's acting like a five-year-old having a tantrum." She laughed again, and again without humour. "It's the first time she's done this, the first change we've seen, and it just so happens that Carlisle's in surgery right now so he can't come home."

"Maybe I could help," I offered, doubtful.

"Well, I don't know, but I guess you could give it a try." She shrugged. "It's not like she'll listen to the rest of us."

I pulled into the massive garage the Cullens had beside the silver Volvo then followed Alice into the house. As she opened the door we heard someone yell, then something smashed. Alice was as shocked as I was when we walked through the door. There were blankets and pillows strewn across the floor and there was a smashed crystal flower vase, the water seeping into one of the whit pillows. Emmet, Rosalie, Jasper and Edward all shared the same stunned expression, staring at Esme who was sitting on one of the pristine white couches, her back toward me. She whipped her head around when she heard Alice and I come in. She didn't look like the sweet Esme I remembered; she had a look of wild rage in her black eyes.

"What happened?" Alice looked around the room, amazed at what she was seeing.

"Nothing, Alice," Esme hissed at her. She looked like the vampire she really was. "It doesn't matter."

It was quiet for a moment, everyone was frozen. Then Rosalie spoke: "We're going now. Okay, Esme? We'll just be out for a couple of hours."

"Fine, Rosalie."

"Come on, Emmett, let's go." They walked toward the garage, but Emmett paused and turned around at the door.

"Hey, Jasper, Alice. You wanna come?"

Jasper looked to Alice for consent. "You can go, Jazz. I'm going to stay, this time."

Before he left, Jasper looked at Edward who nodded his agreement to Jasper's unspoken question. "Just hold on a second, guys, I'll be right there," Jasper told Rosalie and Emmett.

Suddenly, I felt a big wave of calm come over me. I looked at Alice. "Jasper's trying to calm Esme down to take her upstairs. She has to sleep, but she can't when she's all worked up like this," she explained.

When Jasper thought Esme was calm enough, he walked over to her, stood there a moment, then leaned down and picked her up. He carried her upstairs. Edward and Alice followed him, so I did, too.

Jasper was laying Esme down on the bed. She was fighting, though. He tried to cover her up, but, as Alice had said, she wouldn't cooperate. Jasper stopped fighting with Esme and looked at Alice as if to say "she's all yours", and left with Emmett and Rosalie to catch a new movie in Port Angeles.

Alice went over to Esme who was sitting there stubbornly with her arms crossed across her chest and pouting. "You know, Esme, _Carlisle_ was the one who said you needed to sleep this afternoon."

Esme laid down when she heard this, but didn't close her eyes. Instead she looked at the picture frame on her bedside table.

"No, Esme, you can't stay up until he gets back," Edward answered some unspoken question. "He said this morning that he wanted to see you asleep when he comes back this afternoon, which is in about"—he looked at his watch—"half an hour."

Alice tried, like Jasper did, to cover Esme with the sheets but, like before, she just kicked them off. She really was acting just like a five year old who doesn't want to have a nap. Alice sighed and turned to look at Edward and me with an exasperated expression.

"Maybe she would," Edward said to Alice. They were having one of those really annoying conversations where I could only hear half. "She could always _try_. It's worth a shot."

I looked at Alice, confused. "What?"

"Could you try?" she whispered so Esme couldn't hear her. "You know, with Esme?"

"I guess I could. I did say I would help," I replied.

"We'll leave you alone, all right? We'll be right outside the door."

"Okay."

They walked out the door leaving me alone with Esme. I took a deep breath. _Well, here goes nothing. All I have to do is think of a way to make my vampire soon-to-be-mother-in-law listen to me so I can get her to go to sleep and make everyone happier. That sounds so weird_, I thought.

"Esme?" She didn't look at me. She was looking at the picture on her bedside table still. _What could she possibly be looking at?_

I walked over to her bedside table and looked at the picture:

It looked like it was spring. There were flowers covering the lush green grass. There was a large tree right in the middle of the picture with two people on a swing. Esme was dressed in a white sundress, splashed with sunflowers and daisies in her hair. Carlisle was dressed casually, in a light white shirt. The wind was blowing Esme's hair out behind her and the sun was making their skin sparkle. They were laughing carelessly. It was one of those times that they really looked and acted their true ages.

It really was a beautiful picture, but in order to get her attention I needed her to stop looking at the picture. I picked up the picture frame and turned to put it down on another table when I heard a growl come from behind me. I turned around. Esme was crouched on all fours, staring at me like I was something to eat. I felt the picture of her and Carlisle slip from my fingers as I realized what she was going to do…she was the predator and I was her prey….


	8. Chapter 8

**I'm very sorry for the VERY delayed up date. Been really busy.**

_Disclaimer: The original characters and plot are the property of the author, Stephanie Meyer. _

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**Bella's POV **

_I picked up the picture frame and turned to put it down on another table when I heard a growl come from behind me. I turned around. Esme was crouched on all fours, staring at me like I was something to eat. I felt the picture of her and Carlisle slip from my fingers as I realized what she was going to do…she was the predator and I was her prey…._

Esme continued to stare at me, snarling and growling and getting ready to pounce, when Edward and Alice ran into the room. Their movements blurred in my vision. They both reached Esme at the exact same moment and grabbed her arms, restraining her as best they could as she was moving so violently. She was trying her best to shake them off, but it wasn't working.

"Stop it, Esme," Alice almost pleaded, frustration seeping into her voice as Esme tried to bite her fingers.

"Is he still coming, Alice?" Edward asked as he tried to avoid Esme's sharp teeth. I never heard Alice's reply because Esme had somehow escaped Alice's tight grip on her arm and was trying to lunge toward he again. Alice cussed, which was really not like her at all. Thankfully Edward was still holding onto Esme but he was having trouble holding her off by himself, despite his strength. At that moment I was truly afraid although I knew in my heart that Edward would not let her harm me, but this was his mother for all intents and purposes, this was different.

Esme was about a foot away from me snapping her venom coated teeth at me. There was a look of sheer hatred on her face and her eyes had a wild look to them, they were as black as coal. It was horrible, especially since the last time I had looked into those eyes all I had seen was love and devotion, the kind of love and devotion only a mother could show. I was afraid, very afraid.

I stepped back until I could feel my back hit the wall, the glass shards from the broken picture crunching underneath my feet. Just then a memory flooded into my mind, a memory of not so long ago when the Cullens fought against the newborns.

That time Esme was helping to protect me, no like now, now she just wanted to kill me. It was horrible and painful seeing Esme like this—all wild and…dangerous. It is times like this that remind me of what the Cullens really are; it reminded me that Edward could be dangerous too. As I stood there, terrified I thought to myself, _"Now was not the time to be thinking about wedding plans and the honeymoon after, but was my decision to remain human before the wedding something I could do? Would I need to rethink my plans and persuade Edward to change me before the wedding?"_

I stirred from my reverie when I heard the sound of wood splintering and glass shattering and I focused again on what was happening in front of me. Alice had regained her grip on Esme but she had, in all her anger and frustration with her thirst, kicked a table and sent the other pictures of her family falling to the floor.

I heard the door burst open and I sudden rush of air go past me. I looked over and realized that Carlisle had entered the room. He went to kneel in front of Esme and reached to take her face gently into his hands. He very carefully placed a hand on either side of her face and ever so softly began to speak to her in his calming voice. "Remember who you are, sweetheart. You're not like this at all. Think of the people you love, Esme. You don't want to hurt them, you don't want to hurt Bella, do you? I know that's the last thing you want to do."

As Carlisle said this Esme seemed to calm down and stop struggling. She looked at Carlisle, realizing who he was. Her face looked shocked, embarrassed and confused. She looked from Carlisle to me and back to Carlisle. Her mouth fell open, horrified at what she had tried to do. "It's all right, Alice, Edward. You can let her go now, she will be all right."

Even though Edward trusted his adopted father explicitly he seemed reluctant to let go of Esme—for my safety, of course. Although right now I was a little glad he was so protective.

Carlisle stood up and tried to bring Esme into his arms. As soon as he started to do so Esme turned and dived into the bed to crawl under the blankets, hiding herself from us. Carlisle sighed and went to clean up all the broken glass.

Edward walked over to where I was standing, rigid against the wall. He pulled me into his arms and hugged me tightly. I lifted my arms around his waist and tucked my head under his chin. He spoke quietly saying, "Are you okay, Bella?"

"Of course," I lied. If I was honest with myself, I was quite shaken by the whole thing. I truly did not think that something like this could happen, especially involving Esme! It wasn't on the same scale as watching Edward fighting Victoria but it was close. I don't think I fool Edward, however!

"Really?" He started to lead me out of the room.

"Yes, I'm fine, but Esme, is she okay?"

"She'll be fine, Bella." Carlisle came up from behind us. He sounded frustrated. Not particularly at anyone, but more of at the situation. "You don't have to worry about her."

How am I supposed to not worry about Esme? The most gentle person I know almost killed me! Something strange is happening to the family I love. Esme seems to be developing human traits but still retains her vampire traits. Another problem is that Rosalie is becoming more bitter that ever and no one knows what to do to help or to stop what is happening. It's no wonder that Carlisle is stressed out, if vampires can be stressed!

I still can't help but think that this is my fault somehow. If I had just done something differently maybe it wouldn't have turned out this way. If I wasn't a fragile human none of this would have happened.

"Bella, please stop thinking like that," Edward chastised.

"You don't know what I'm thinking, Edward," I mumbled.

"No, I can't but I can tell from the look in your eyes. This wasn't your fault you know," he said, leading me into his bedroom and sitting me down on top of the bed. He sat alongside me and put his finger under my chin and lifted it up so I had to look into his eyes.

"But what if it is, Edward? What if I could have stopped this somehow? Your family was normal until you met me."

"Bella, we're vampires. What part of that seems normal to you?" He grinned. We sat there just looking at each other until he sighed. "Bella, I'm so sorry about Esme, I never thought for a second that she would try and attack you. Once again I have let you down, I'm so sorry!"

"Edward," I scolded, "I have told you before, you cannot protect me from everything all of the time, that's just silly."

Edward looked deep into my eyes and said, "Bella, everything I do is to protect you, that's my job. I just never thought that my mother would be the one I would have to protect you from."


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